"We don't say those things in class!"

“We don’t say those words in class!”

A time when you witnessed an adult (or yourself) reprimand or silence a child after he or she pointed out someone they saw as different (e.g., "That lady talks funny," " That man only has one leg!" "Why is that man so pretty!"). Include what the child said and what the adult did or said in response. (Note: If you cannot think of a specific time ask a friend or family member.)

A friend of mine was looking back on times when children commented on her physical disability. She had a disease that prevented her from walking without using a wheel chair, crutches, or a walker. Children used to stare at her and ask questions about her why she had a wheel chair, crutches, or a walker. She always smiled and was willing to talk about her handicap. She thought that it allowed children to become more comfortable around people who are different based on being handicap and/or different from them. In most of her encounters with children, the parents used to try to stop their child from talking about the physical disability that my friend suffered from. She didn’t mind talking about her disability but parents tried to hush their child from speaking to my friend about her disability.

What messages might have been communicated to this child by the adult's response

The adults that tried to stop the children were indirectly communicating that there are taboo topics that we don’t talk about. It teaches children that is rude to inquire about individuals that are different. Young children identify and at times, verbally acknowledge that they know that someone is different from them. It is healthy for children to respectfully engage in conversation with someone who is handicap. My friend would prefer for both children and adults to talk with her instead of stare.

An example of how an anti-bias educator might have responded to support the child's (or classroom's ) understanding

An anti-bias educator would have allowed the child to inquire about my friend’s handicap in a respectful manner. He/she would encourage the child to learn about individuals who are different and to learn about others. My friend thinks the same way as an anti-bias educator. She invites others to ask her about her physical condition to share that individuals are different.